“Don’t try to get people to be on your wavelength. Just stay aligned and let the law of vibration bring people to you like a magnet. True empowerment is staying in the vibration of joy and inviting others to join you there, not leaving your vibration to meet them.”
I have read through this quote numerous times: to myself, in yoga classes, and even to friends; however, upon recently re-visiting this piece of prose it took on a new meaning. I know, and have understood for a while now, that I am the only person who can affect or control my own state of mind (both positively and negatively). I am the one who gets to decide how outside forces manifest within myself and ultimately impact my present reality. Yet, I find myself shifting out of my vibration and blaming others for my negative head space and heightened emotions. So, How? (I ask myself) am I able to conceptualize the importance of self-reflection while still allowing others behavior to affect me? And furthermore, how is it that I am then finding myself blaming others for not understanding and/or changing when the answers seem to be so obvious?
In turn, this cycle continues to spin around and around making the negativity almost impossible for me to avoid – I feel it sucking me in instead of my coping skills allowing me to deflect it. As “normal” as it is to flow through the emotional highs and lows of life – I find it important to constantly reflect on my emotional state and increase my own awareness of how to better access the things that make me feel good. When experiencing disheartening moments I find it helpful to remind myself of the infamous “Four Agreements” by Don Miguel Ruiz; most of life’s answers can be found in the brilliant words of Ruiz and the one that rings the most true to my line of current thinking in terms of energy and vibration is: “do not take anything personally” (read that again one more time to yourself).
When first exploring the writings of Ruiz I was inspired to live a life free from hurt, judgement, pain, or suffering. In reality, it took about three hours for me to pop my new found bubble of bliss when faced with the difficulties of life. I continue to revisit these ideas and teachings as they always take on a new and more powerful meaning for me. Lately, I have been allowing the words and actions of others to adversely affect my head space, vibration, mood, and ultimately my level of engagement. In retrospect, the words and actions of others are not the cause; the true cause is my ego making everything about “me.” The way in which others navigate their lives should have no impact on my emotional state as they are living in their own reality, not mine. Just because I would handle something differently does not necessarily mean I am “right” and they are “wrong.”
Staying in the mind frame of “right” and “wrong” only serves to create an imbalance in my own world. Ultimately, everyone is not going to care about or handle things the way I do, a lot of people lack self-awareness, and most of the time the people I interact with are not waking up in the morning with a vendetta to ruin my mood (although it can certainly can feel that way). This level of awareness allows me to get curious about my own coping skills and decide if there are things that I can do differently in order to “side step” the negativity. I like to imagine these moments as a boxing match – when negativity, ignorance, and unawareness try to jab me in the face, I need to be acutely present in order to dodge the hit and maintain my stance.
Everything is energy and energy is constantly changing. In order to remain in the vibration of joy work has to be done to recognize and maintain inner peace. For some peace may be achieved by communicating truth, for others it may look like disconnection from triggers or using thought tools such as visualization, breathing techniques or cognitive re-framing. Whatever the case may be, it is worth exploring more about how your body reacts to emotional situations, and equally important to understand how you consciously bring yourself back to baseline.
When energy vibrations are off it can feel as though the cards are stacked against you; just take a deep breath and remember: It’s. Not. Personal.
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